10 Red Flags for those Blinded by Romance

There are often signs of impending dangers in a relationship that if overlooked can lead to more serious problems. The following indicators are red flags in case you are in a bad relationship:

1. Abuse of any kind: Misunderstandings are normal which should be followed with quick resolution. If fighting in your courtship world means hitting, pushing, shoving, name calling, yelling, manipulating, or anything rude that occurs on a consistent basis then, of course, turn around and walk away. It’s simple. In bad relationships, bad things happen and will continue to happen if you let them. Don’t be stupid

2. Cohabitation as singles: This might feel so right, as you conjure every excuse in the world to continue. However, what seems right in the heat of the moment is not worth its cost in the end. When you have sex with anyone other than someone you are married to, things happen, bad things. It takes one time to lose your virginity, one time to contract an STD, one time to become addicted to sexual immorality, one time for your fiance's respect for you to evaporate forever.

3. Fear-provoking questions in the mind: James T. Draper wrote, “Doubt never means yes and always means no or wait a while: God does not lead through doubt". If you aren’t 100 percent certain that things should progress, you should better take a time-out from the relationship and pray for God to clearly confirm His will! (As tough as that might be)

4. Reservation by loved ones: Are family and/or friends at all iffy about your decision to move forward with the one you are presently dating? Rather than take a defensive approach to their input, consider that emotions can hamper your ability to see as clearly as those positioned on the outside-looking-in to your life

5. Gradual and sustained dissipating affection

6. You do not share the same faith: Any emotional attachment you have towards a person who is not on the same spiritual page as you, or vice versa, is an unhealthy attachment. Missionary courtship does not work.

7. Protracted unresolved disagreements on basic issues: Do you usually fall into the trap of blaming each other and fail to compromise or apologize? As a result, you experience less warmth and closeness.

8. Difficulty in connecting with each other’s family and friends

9. You feel criticized and put down by your partner frequently and this leaves you feeling less than “good enough”: According to renowned relationship expert Dr. John Gottman, criticism is one of the main reasons why marriages collapse.

10. One person has most of the power over the two of you: Does your loved one have too much power over you, aside from the power of love? A sure sign of unhealthiness is when someone has more power over you than you have over yourself. Remember—no one has power over you unless you give it to them!

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